Pastors

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Pastor, what do you do when you’re ’out of season’?

Pic: D Groenenboom

“Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction.” (2 Timothy 4:2, NIV)

Reflecting on this passage this morning, I thought about that phrase “be prepared in season and out of season.”

In the original, ‘be prepared’ is a call to ‘stand up’ or ‘be ready’ to preach and minister under any circumstance. Lea and Griffin (NAC) see this as staying on task whether you feel like it or not, and/or whether the people under your care find it convenient or not.

I’m guessing most pastors sense when either they or their church is in season or out of season: times of self-doubt, fatigue, feelings of hopelessness and/or helplessness. Or church congregations which may need challenge, correction, or gentle guidance into the newness of the Kingdom (see 2 Tim 4:1).

It would be nice if all pastors found these situations easy to work out. It would be great to know they can pick themselves up in times of doubt, or tiredness, or the weariness of long obedience. Truth is, even if a pastor has sufficient mental clarity to make what they believe to be sound decisions at such times, few have the necessary objectivity and headspace to do so.

This is one of the reasons why plurality of leadership is a very good thing in the church. Besides being biblical, pastors can talk through challenging matters and prayerfully decide with their team what the best approach might be.

So, what does a pastor when they find themselves ‘out of season’? When things are not going well, when ministry – too often – interrupts life, well-being, and healthy practice?

Beyond any team discussion of pastoral challenges, the guided reflection of regular pastoral supervision can be incredibly helpful. Supervision sessions can bring new understanding to how one responds to ministry complexities, to one’s perceptions and perspectives. Pastoral Supervision provides a safe and confidential space to reflect on one’s work, how one is responding to ministry situations, and how one might do it better.

An ‘out of season’ moment…

Consider how Pastor John* dealt with his ‘out of season’ experience…

John’s interactions with Harry* were becoming complicated. It seemed that every time they spoke there was awkwardness and discomfort. John sensed that Harry was unhappy. Was it something John was doing? A direction the church was taking? Something about John himself? He just couldn’t work it out. John knew he had to do something, but it was all too confusing to think clearly about it all.

John, like most pastors, loved pastoral work and often took the role of peacemaker. He didn’t like it when people conveyed disapproval or unhappiness. John was especially uncomfortable because it had gotten back to him that Harry had spoken to others about his feelings. Would others turn against him too? What was Harry’s problem? What had John done wrong? What could he do about it? Could he do anything to change the situation?

An additional complication – not uncommon in church circles – was that Harry had strong connections with some of John’s co-leaders – that made any discussion of the issue quite tricky.

Sure enough, when John was trying to turn off at night, those questions yapped like a stray dog at the heels of his consciousness. So he was wide awake at a time when he could ill afford it. John was tired, confused, isolated and increasingly anxious.

John’s pastoral supervision experience…

John took his experience to his next supervision session. The supervisor sat with John, probing various perspectives, enabling John to fully explore and verbalise his experience. This helped John broaden his perspective and get some clarity on his core responsibilities. Supervision provided a safe space for John to consider what Harry’s point of view might be. Together John and his supervisor explored what Scripture might have to say to John, to Harry, and what impact the Gospel might have on it all.

Supervision helped John untangle his thoughts and responses. The Gospel truths John considered with his Supervisor were not new to him, but he did find some new ways to apply them to his complex situation. John’s Supervisor wasn’t telling John what he should do: he just helped him access his own theology and apply it to his pastoral interactions. In the sessions John was able to decide on a plan to move ahead and identified some specific ways he could interact with Harry.

Supervision helped John find clarity on his own responses and what he might be able to do differently. John felt safe to be vulnerable about himself, his fears, and his thoughts about Harry. He was able to review how things unfolded in subsequent supervision sessions.

The value of supervision

While a coach might have worked with John to identify better goals and strategies, and a mentor might have passed on some of their timely wisdom, John’s professional pastoral supervisor helped him see this issue with greater clarity. He guided John to identify how Scripture and theology informed the context, and drew it all together in a workable action plan to be reviewed in future sessions. 

Supervision is no silver bullet. The sessions can be hard work, but they allow a vulnerability, an objectivity and discernment that can lead to significant learning outcomes and better ministry. For both John and Harry, the Gospel might come to greater expression, and that would be good news all around.

*Not their real names

David Groenenboom

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How can I manage pastoral anxiety?

Pastor Bob is not doing great. He’s guessing the stress he’s feeling is not healthy. The feeling leaves him a little insecure, and he wonders whether he’s leading Green Pastures Church as well as he could be. 

Bob – like so many others – is a solo pastor. Sure, he has a team of co-leaders around him. They are good hearted people, faithful Christians, long term members, volunteers. 

Bob gets on well with all of them, although there’s one person – Charlie – whom he’s finding a little challenging lately. Charlie has a strong personality and doesn’t mind telling Bob what the church really should be doing. Bob feels pressured. Charlie has even said Bob should be doing more: more contact with church members, develop outreach opportunities, shorten his sermons a bit, give better application. The last time Charlie and Bob chatted, it was cordial enough, but Bob sensed they weren’t making headway. He guesses Charlie is thinking the same. Bob knows that when Charlie talks, people listen. And what if he’s talking? What if he’s sharing his thoughts about Bob?

Some nights Bob lies awake turning it all over. He’s really tired and needs sleep, but it doesn’t come easily. When he wakes he seems more exhausted than ever. There’s so much to do but his capacity is waning. And it’s not getting any better…

Bob wonders who he can talk to… 

He doesn’t want to burden his wife: she has enough on her plate with her own work and wrangling the kids. Bob doesn’t feel that comfortable talking with her about another Green Pastures leader, anyway. That could get awkward for both of them.

He considers talking with some other Green Pastures leaders. He’s hesitant because they all have good relationships with Charlie. Talking with them might mess with those loyalties. Besides, what would they think? He decides it’s all too risky.

There are other pastoral colleagues nearby, but Bob wonders whether they’d see him as a pastoral battler, or worse: a failure. In a weird way he’s thankful he’s not that close to any of them.

So along with the stress and confusion he feels, Bob is feels isolated and a little anxious. How can he sort this out? How can he find clarity? How can he unravel all his mixed emotions and complicated relationships?

Bob stares at his coffee, and wonders “is this what ministry is supposed to be?” Bob leaves the thought hanging. He doesn’t have any answers.

Whereas many in ordained ministry attest to fulfilment and joy in their calling, there are notable others reporting a low sense of well-being, feeling isolated, accessing counselling for strained personal and ministerial relationships, or requesting psychiatric referral or therapy for mental health issues.

Gubi, Korris & West, Reflective Practice Groups for Clergy,
University of Chester Press, 2020 p.57

This is where Professional Pastoral Supervision can really help Bob. Regular supervision sessions can provide a safe space for Bob to work through his situation. Over time, Bob can unravel the tangled bits and pieces, finding some clarity on how to move forward. 

Supervision sessions could help Bob

  • Rediscover his core calling. The reflexive sessions helping him to articulate what matters most and how he can serve his church best
  • Safely explore the situation with Charlie, discerning better responses and reviewing his perceptions about Charlie in the confidential context supervision provides
  • Apply his theological framework to develop better pastoral practice, working through new ideas and approaches that work better
  • Review his workload and consider how he might do things differently

Pastoral Supervision does not provide easy answers or quick fixes. A Supervisor will work with Bob’s ministry philosophy, respect his theological emphases, along with his church context, governance and polity. Professional Pastoral Supervision is an ideal context for personal pastoral development.

Read this to find out how Professional Pastoral Supervision can help you, or slip me a message or email. I’m pretty sure we’ll be able to work something out that helps you keep moving forward in healthy and sustainable ways.

Dave Groenenboom
Paraklesis Supervision
Horsfield Bay, NSW

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Pastor: You Are Not Alone

Pastoral ministry in a local church can be a place of real joy and transformation. It can also have its share of confusion, isolation and on occasions, exhaustion. All this can have real impacts on personal well-being, resilience and ministry effectiveness.

Thankfully, Pastoral Supervision is just the place to talk about it all confidentially and supportively.

Pastoral Supervision is a safe and courageous space to reflect on your ministry, how it might be impacting you and those close to you, and to learn how to do things differently.

That’s why I use the word “paraklesis” – it’s a biblical Greek word which means to call beside, or to come beside another. This is what happens in Supervision: your supervisor will come beside you, help you reflect on how things are going, and help you find clarity amidst all the business and confusion.

Obviously, face to face sessions are wonderful, but technology offers terrific opportunities even when two people cannot be together. I can deliver sessions over Zoom, too, so even if you’re interstate or in a regional area, it’s all workable.

I’m based on the NSW Central Coast, and have 40 years experience in varied local church and organisational contexts, so we’ll likely connect well no matter which context you’re in right now.

‘Like’ this page, and email me if you’d like to explore how this can work for you.

David Groenenboom

Pastoral Supervisor

Paraklesis Ministries

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Pastoral Supervision: An Invitation

What is pastoral supervision?

One of the best ways to understand pastoral supervision is to see it in the Biblical concept of “paraklesis”. We find the word group in the New Testament, amongst other things, to describe one person coming beside another to encourage and support them. Jesus used this word when talking to his disciples about the Holy Spirit, whom he would send to lead his people into all truth and be with them forever (see John 14:15ff, 15:26). The word is used to describe Barnabas the ‘son of encouragement’ (Acts 4:36). In Romans 15 Paul uses the word to refer to the endurance and encouragement that comes from Scripture and which brings hope. This is why in pastoral supervision a supervisor comes beside a minister to help them reflect on their ministry, and how they are engaging with that work, with a view to doing things differently in the future.

A safe and courageous space

Pastoral Supervision is a context of both safety and courage. It is ‘safe’ because supervision sessions are governed by strict confidentiality. Ministers and ministry workers can be assured that anything discussed will go no further (the only limitations here are when someone else is at risk, or reportable actions have been disclosed). Over my nearly 40 years in ministry, the best contexts I had to speak very candidly was when I was talking with someone acting as supervisor. Thankfully in my last two pastorates I was blessed with such people, and equally blessed that my local church supported those engagements in principle and financially. Sure, fellow leaders can be trusted too, but I found the supervisory context gave greater objectivity and freedom. In that sense supervision was particularly valuable.

Pastoral Supervision is not only safe, it is also courageous. It affords an opportunity to discuss one’s struggles, fears, joys and aspirations. It really is a blessing to be able to open up about the things that keep one awake at night, or the tendency to avoid certain situations/issues, or the weight of pastoral burdens, interactions with difficult people, even decisions one might struggle with in the local church or wider assemblies. Few ministers have contexts where they can courageously and with vulnerability engage in such self examination with a suitably qualified person.

While I recognise my knowledge of what other pastors are doing is not exhaustive, I think it’s fair to say throughout the recent history of the Australian evangelical church, our ability to engage in disciplined reflection about our calling and how we are going with it has not been a strong point. For too many, ministry experience has sometimes, perhaps often, been one of isolation, loneliness and helplessness. Supervision is a critical piece in changing that scenario.

If you have ever been asked for advice in situations of local church tension or ministry heartache you will probably have recognised the value of early intervention. You may also have observed that it did not eventuate, and that it was probably too late to retrieve the situation. Pastoral Supervision is no silver bullet to prevent such tragedies, but the anecdotal evidence indicates that good supervisory practice is a critical piece in reducing the incidence of pastoral breakdown.

What are your thoughts?